The right and wrong way to promote self-esteem in our child with Ashely Merryman

Self Esteem bad for children?  Really?  Listen up and you can learn more about how researchers caution us on how we promote children’s self-esteem.

Summer is over and school is back in session.  It’s a perfect time to listen to my next podcast.  I have Ashley Merryman as a guest today and she is the co-author of two New York Time’s best-selling books, Nurture Shock; New Thinking About Children and Top Dog; The Science of Winning and Losing.  “Nurture Shock; New Thinking About children” and Top Dog; The Science of Winning and Losing.”  For 6 months, Nurture Shock, was on the New York Times bestseller list and an Amazon Top Nonfiction 100 book for over a year.  Nurture Shock has been published in 16 different languages and is a worldwide phenomenon.

We all want to help our children succeed.  Today we are going to speak with Ms. Merryman and she will share with us some of the shocking information that was uncovered with dynamic research in the book, Nurture Shock.  Researchers caution against promoting children’s self-esteem.  In Nurture Shock it states, “Baumeister concluded, that having high self-esteem didn’t improve grades or career achievement.  It didn’t even reduce alcohol usage.  And it especially did not lower violence of any sort.  (Highly aggressive, violent people happen to think very highly of themselves, debunking the theory that people are aggressive to make up for low self-esteem.)”

In this podcast, you will learn the following:

  • Extravagant universal praise can lead to narcissism
  • Universal trophies need to stop
  • Labeling children as smart may cause your children to UNDERPERFORM
  • What kind of praise can be effective
  • “Why don’t White Parents talk about race?”
  • What parents can do to reduce racism

Check out Ashley Merryman’s website to find out more information regarding her books, Top Dog and Nurture Shock.

Also mentioned:

Kristin Slice at SBDC (Small Business Development Center) in Arizona servicing Maricopa County.

Costco Connection Magazine

Wow – this is such a great podcast.  I could have talked to her for hours upon hours.  She was terrific and the books have incredible research.

Thanks again for listening.